Since the last couple of nights, the hamstring muscles of my right leg have been feeling tight enough to cause discomfort, due to which I’ve been having trouble getting to sleep. This bothers me on many levels, but especially because our bodies NEED sleep for repair and restoration every night. A little search online led me to find out that hamstrings tend to tighten when they are trying to protect your back. So why did my back need protection? Well, it’s because I have been experiencing pain for months, and I’ve been doing yoga to help with that…only it hasn’t really been working. I’ve also noticed other pains cropping up, in my heels and my knees. Last night I finally understood what the problem actually was though, and the clue lay in the feeling of weakness I have also lately been experiencing in my middle body as I toss and turn at night. A little voice inside me whispered…it’s not about your back or your knees or your feet my child……it’s about your core.
This little voice was all I needed to hear to guide me to seek out a very short 10 minute core yoga routine that would target the abs, and as I practiced I came to realize how much I’ve been neglecting them. Or perhaps it’s the 50’s telling me to wake up and get busy doing some real work.
It’s very easy to overlook one’s core muscles apparently, and I can’t believe I am guilty of this, knowing all I know, having heard countless instructors talk about strengthening your core to strengthen your back. And yet, I’ve never really delved into the actual anatomy of my core muscles, what they are, how many there are, and what function they each perform to keep my entire trunk working properly. Another little search provided me with all of this crucial info.
I also realize that I’ve been using my back to lift heavy things instead of my core muscles, so it’s been a loop of misuse. it’s one thing to have information stored away in your brain and quite a different thing to begin to grasp just how connected everything is. Feet, knees, hamstrings, glutes, spine, core, all working in glorious cohesion, and one weak link affects all the others. The thing to pinpoint is…what is that weakest link? Hint: It’s not where the pain manifests …
So here’s to committing myself to a much more intentional, aware and targeted daily workout routine for a month and see what difference that makes, not only to my overall strength, but also my nightly sleep. Quite excited about this! It’s time to stop scrolling fitness reels and mindlessly consuming content on Instagram and consciously put into practice all the wisdom I glean now instead of saving posts to look at later. I never visit later.
In other news, I acknowledged the loss of two very old trees I used to know, one a majestic gulmohar I used to climb and hang out in between the ages of 8 and 12. This tree died a very tragic death, apparently due to an underground gas leak that killed many trees in the entire neighbourhood. The other was a very tall and old jamun, diagonally across the’ gulmohar, which harboured a lot of birds and dropped a lot of fruit on the road below. Heaven help your car if it was parked underneath. The people who lived in the house behind this tree had it chopped down a couple of years ago, but for some reason I registered the absence of it yesterday when I happened to park my car in that corner after a long time. Without the protective foliage of both these old trees, the street outside my old home felt hot and inhospitable in the mid morning sun, as if a deeply familiar place had become a stranger. It used to be really beautiful once, with the vermilion flowers of the gulmohar and the cool shade of the jamun.
Eldest Sis said that when the neighbours chopped down that tree, they found a hollow in it filled with socks. The socks had all been stolen from the clothesline in her balcony and deposited in the tree hollow by crows. What a cute thought 😊
Jimmy has not returned. My ambivalence has given way to a deep grief that we may actually never see him again. It’s strange sometimes to realize how alone we are in feeling our feels. A few evenings ago I actually socialized and those who know me well asked how my cats were doing. I mentioned Fuzzy’s death and the loss of Jimmy but talking about it fell short of the depth of sadness felt, and my voice trailed off when I realized these things can’t really be conveyed…and I make peace with this. It boils down to this: Jimmy was love, and his presence in and around our home had a value that only those who loved him could feel, and this feeling is precious to me and the only other person privy to this very visceral knowledge is Amu, for which I am very grateful. Huz shares the sadness too in his own way. Together we will keep our love-flame lit, that eternal one that binds us all.
munira's bubble 